💌 Dear You (and the One You Chose to Share a Roof With) A Letter About Love After “I Do”
💌 Dear You (and the One You Chose to Share a Roof With)
A Letter About Love After “I Do”
Some nights, when the house is quiet and the phones glow softly between two sighs, I wonder — how can two people sleep inches apart and still feel oceans away?
You love each other, yes. You share walls, bills, memories, maybe even a pillow. But sometimes, love starts to fade not because it’s gone — but because it’s gone unwatered.
So here’s a thought I wish someone had whispered earlier:
Even after you say I do, you must still pursue.
Still woo.
Still fall in love, again and again, with the same soul wearing slightly different skin.
🌹 The Myth of “Settling In”
They said, “Once you find your person, you can finally relax.”
But they forgot to tell us that love, like a garden, wilts without tending.
We settle in — into routines, habits, half-finished conversations.
We stop dressing up for dinner.
We stop asking how the other’s day really was.
We start assuming the other will just… understand.
And then, one day, we wake up and realize we’ve become familiar strangers — living in parallel lives that no longer touch.
But love isn’t a monument you build once. It’s a candle that asks to be relit — every day, in small and gentle ways.
🌙 Why We Drift Apart (Even Under the Same Roof)
Aloofness doesn’t arrive like a storm. It seeps in like fog.
It begins with tiredness — too much work, too little rest.
Then comfort — the kind that turns into complacency.
Then the quiet belief that love should be “easy” now.
But real intimacy is not about ease — it’s about effort.
We don’t stop loving each other; we just stop showing it.
And slowly, love becomes background noise — still there, but unheard.
Sometimes, we pull away because we’re guarding old hurts, or because life feels too heavy to carry together. But the truth is: distance won’t protect us. It only deepens the ache.
💞 How to Harness Love (Not Just Hold It)
1. Pursue them, still.
Send a playful message in the middle of the day. Leave a note on their coffee mug. Whisper something kind just because. Love thrives on surprise — not grand, but tender.
2. Stay curious.
Ask about their dreams, not their deadlines. People don’t stop changing; we just stop noticing.
3. Create small rituals of closeness.
A morning hug before work. A nightly walk. Sharing dessert off one plate. Little things are the heartbeat of long love.
4. Listen like it’s the first time.
No phones. No fixing. Just listen with your whole face, your whole heart. Let them know their words still matter.
5. Laugh more.
Laughter is the shortest distance between two hearts. Be silly. Dance barefoot in the kitchen. Watch something that makes you both cry and giggle.
6. Speak to heal, not to win.
If something hurts, say it softly. Choose “us” over “being right.” Remember: love is not a debate, it’s a duet.
💫 Love After the Spark
Maybe this is what mature love really is — not fireworks, but a slow-burning candle that warms instead of blinds.
Pursuing your partner after marriage isn’t chasing what once was; it’s nurturing what still is.
It’s saying, I see you.
I still choose you, even after the glitter faded, even after we saw each other’s shadows.
So tonight, if you’re reading this — maybe sitting beside the one you promised forever to — look over.
Not with duty, but with wonder.
Ask them something simple.
Touch their hand.
Tell them you’re glad they’re here.
Because love doesn’t end at I do.
It begins every time you whisper, I still do.
Comments
Post a Comment